Climate-Conscious Oscar Nom Glues Himself to Starbucks Counter so Minorities Can Finally Afford Fake Milk – Opinion

Starbucks is the Hollywood Star.

Actor James Cromwell — featured in films such as L.A. Confidential, Babe, The Green Mile —Recently, I discovered a sweet method to cream coffee companies.

The chain does charge extra for plant-based dairy products, as it turned out.

James was a passionate PETA member, and so he began to formulate a plan.

In order to stop Starbucks from choosing their preferred charging scheme, the 82-year-old glued himself to a New York City cafe’s counter — that’ll teach ’em.

From there — because, given the glue, he couldn’t do it from anywhere else — he read a prepared statement.

As reported by Harrisburg’s ABC27, he even managed to raze the restaurant as racist:

[H]e denounced Starbucks’ vegan-milk upcharge, calling it harmful to the environment and discriminatory toward those who suffer from lactose-intolerance, which affects people of color at a greater percentage, according to the National Institutes of Health.

While “situated among a group of PETA-affiliated protestors near the Starbucks register,” he posed the following:

“When will you stop raking in huge profits while customers, animals and the environment suffer? When will you stop penalizing people for their ethnicities, their morals?”

Is racism solved? Fake milk made free? Are a staggering number of nonwhites ordering at Starbucks, demanding non-mammalian milk, and then leaving without their drink because they couldn’t afford it? Oder worse yet, do they continue to buy regular milk, only to then suffer the KKK-caused Squirts

The questions keep coming.

Meanwhile, James and company chanted, “Save the planet, save the cows! Stop the vegan upcharge now!”

Cromwell’s no stranger to challenging the world’s ways. Though capitalism is a system in which people can own their own businesses rather than the government taking control — and despite the fact that successful actors generally own their own businesses — in 2017, he decried the “cancer” of capitalism.

A 2018 Variety interview featured him talking about violent revolution.

“This is nascent fascism. We always had a turnkey, totalitarian state — all we needed was an excuse, and all the institutions were in place to turn this into pure fascism. If we don’t stop [President Trump]We will then have an actual revolution. There will then be blood on the streets. … [S]Something is about to happen that is vital to our country and the world. This is an election. In which, hopefully, we will regain democracy. … We will cut through the corruption, [and] we won’t have to do what comes next, which is either a non-violent revolution or a violent one, because this has got to end.”

Perhaps 2020 solved the democracy disaster, so he’s whittled America’s issues down to expensive plant juice.


As I’ve previously written, personally, I don’t understand most protests. The sticky ones:

Lady Glues Herself to the Court During an NBA Game, Because That’s How You Save Chickens

Taiwan’s Brawling Lawmakers Make All the Noise as They Throw Pig Guts at One Another

Climate Change Radicals are Like Many Dingleberries. They Suspend Theirself from a Bridge

Maybe one day.

For the time being, although James didn’t necessarily lose his cool, he eventually became unglued:

The scene was eventually cleared by police officers who informed protestors that Starbucks’ district manager demanded they leave the premises. Cromwell, John Di Leonardo and another activist, who were superglued to the counters, left the scene about half an hour later.



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