Tripping Reporters, Stripping at Executions, and Bodice-Ripping Costumes – Opinion

Our weekly recognition of less-than-meritorious excellence in journalism worthy of a skewed version of Pulitzer Prize consideration.

In addition to our media-mocking endeavor at Townhall Riffed from The Headlines we recognize outstanding journalism performances and collect worthy submissions for Pulitzer Prize boards in various categories. We must recognize journalistic mistakes-excellence in order to correctly identify them.


Distinguished Feature Writing

Many news reports can be read and concluded that the journalists have been using mind-altering substances. This is now confirmed. Ryan Lizza describes how a D.C. law decriminalized certain products and that some journalists chose to take part.

A lot of people here are availing themselves of D.C.’s unique decriminalization rules. Microdosing mushrooms as a kind of performance-enhancing brain boost — already wildly popular among the California tech set — is now fairly common in Washington, especially in media circles. Recreational use — macrodosing? — isn’t all that uncommon either.

Do reporters trip? It makes so much sense.


Distinguished National Reporting

Shatara was a producer of the Alabama news channel’s video. Officials at an Alabama correctional institution had told her that Shatara’s dress style wasn’t appropriate. They deemed her skirt too short and required that Shatara wear rain pants. This interruption to her reporting about the sentence for Joe Nathan James’ convicted murderer was quite a slap on the face.

It is, in my opinion, more than just appropriate,” Shatara stated. “This skirt has been worn to previous executions with no incident.”


Specialized Explanatory Reporting

The media is currently promoting the idea that it is possible to remove all negative aspects from this administration. You can see that gas prices were lower in March, even if inflation is not taken into account.

Taking the prize though might be Van Jones, as he asks us to overlook half a year’s worth of mayhem to come up with a positive result.

“Listen, if you just erase the past six months of nutty stuff, it looks like you’ve got a president that can get an infrastructure bill done, get COVID stuff done, get something done for the American people on climate, get something done on CHIPS- that’s a successful presidency, you just have the past six months of nonsense that takes away from it.”

So, we’ll just eradicate one-third of Biden’s term and then see only good things. Suuuuurrrre….


DIstinguished International Journalism

  • Merco Press – Argentina

The government of Argentina is facing unprecedented scrutiny as the result of severe inflation. Recently the spokeswoman of President Alberto Fernandez found herself embroiled in scandal – for daring to enter a social media contest for a…personal reason.

Argentina’s Presidential Spokeswoman Gabriela Cerruti made the headlines Friday after she was spotted on Instagram entering a Friend’s Day contest to win a dildo, which was promoted under the slogan “Your clitoris is your best friend. Give it a gift.”


Distinguished Cultural Commentary

  • Alex Portee’ – The Today Show

Our cultural landscape contains many important touchesstones that have significant implications for the wider society. The Today Show decided to focus on the fact that George Jetson was born in January. Obsessive fans of this show apparently knew that George would be born this month, sometime in this year.

Adding to the deep import of this news, you have to appreciate the sourcing for this story – the internet.


International Excellence in Reporting

Many countries have a long tradition of creating horrible mascots to represent various events or teams. I dare you not to take a look at it. Brazil’s Senhor Testiculo.)

They have an Oyster Festival in Halifax (Nova Scotia) and released photos of the anthropomorphic bivalve spokesmodel.


Distinguished Investigative Reporting

  • JJ Hendricks – Price Charting Magazine

While going through tons of comic books, the pricing and comic book grading team came up with an idea after perusing the cover art. The outlet sought to see if there had been a change in the representation of women characters over the years using data measurement metrics.

It was discovered that breasts were growing larger and displays had ballooned. Additionally, cleavage display frequency had increased.


Frozen Desserts – A Special Coverage

  • Dennis Lee – Takeout

Adding to the list of things ruined by Joe Biden – or is it Jill Biden?!?! – we learned of the demise of an iconic frozen dessert.

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