Alpha Conservative’s ‘Enormous Pulsating’ Biceps Trigger Feminist Catfight: I’m Not ‘Turned On’

“Damn, that’s one ‘gun show’ I’d attend.”

A feminist activist on Wednesday called for “a serious conversation about” Judicial Watch President Tom Fitton’s bulging biceps, which she has long resented and admired.

Molly Jong-Fast declared that she needed to talk about her feelings in an evening tweet to her quarter-million followers.

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To get the discussion going, she shared a photo of the Fitton’s man-guns against the backdrop of the Washington, D.C. skyline.

Jong-Fast’s fellow activists and writers responded with an outpouring of sexuality, frustration – and sexual frustration.

Most of the commenters affected the same snarky pose as Jong-Fast even as they implicitly acknowledged Fitton’s beefiness.

“How else would he support such heavy stacks of paper?” said Julie Millican, the vice president of Media Matters for America, a left-wing adversary of Judicial Watch.

“[C]learly he wants us to [talk about his biceps], since he constantly photographs himself in short shirt sleeves rather than in a suit,” moaned Never Trumper Cheri Jacobus.

“Obviously, that’s where Tom keeps his freedom,” joked Jason Stein.

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Others protested being forced to consider Fitton’s “enormous pulsating biceps,” as Jong-Fast has previously described them.

“Must we, tho?” asked The Economist’s scrawny Supreme Court reporter Steven Mazie.

Some averred outright disgust at the conservative heavyweight.

“Ewwwww,” said self-described “old as fuck” progressive Jane Helm Gilbert.

One John Scotus announced: “Doesn’t turn me on.”

A few people were honest enough to recognize Fitton’s impressive bulk even if they disagreed with his politics.

“[T]akes are terrible, jacked arms are legit impressive,” admitted Vox editor Aaron Rupar.

“Damn, that’s the one ‘gun show’ I’d attend,” said Laurie L, whose bio identifies her as a “Screaming liberal.”

Meanwhile, Fitton was strictly business. As his liberal love-haters twittered, he promoted Judicial Watch’s latest revelation: a trove of anti-Trump emails sent to the Justice Department by a high-ranking federal prosecutor’s wife during the 2016 election, while the FBI was investigating the future president’s campaign.

This “should alarm us all,” Fitton commented.

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