Queen Elizabeth II’s Christmas Message Reminds Us of the Pain of Loss, Even in the Midst of Celebration – Opinion

To all, Merry Christmas It doesn’t matter how you celebrate Christmas, the holiday is glorious and full of wonder, joy, and incredible bounty. It is my hope that you will be surrounded by the people you love.

Even with all that love, sometimes the absence of people we loved but lost can be more apparent.

Queen Elizabeth II of England gave her traditional Christmas address to the people of Great Britain, and alluded to that loss as she encouraged Britons to embrace the season, in spite of the pallor of death from the “ongoing pandemic.”

Queen Elizabeth speaks of missing her husband’s ‘familiar laugh’ at Christmas https://t.co/1jkOceRthh pic.twitter.com/KWViunp36H

— Reuters (@Reuters) December 25, 2021

In her Christmas Day message, Queen Elizabeth II shared her grief at the loss of her husband and encouraged everyone to have Christmas with their friends, regardless of the continuing pandemic.

Saying she understood the difficulty of spending the holiday season “with one familiar laugh missing,” the monarch delivered her address beside a framed photograph of her arm-in-arm with Prince Philip, who died in April at age 99. On her right shoulder was the same sapphire chrysanthemum brooch she wore in the photo — a glittering statement pin that she also wore as a newlywed.

“Although it’s a time of great happiness and good cheer for many, Christmas can be hard for those who have lost loved ones,” the queen said in the prerecorded message broadcast when many British families were enjoying their traditional Christmas dinner. “This year, especially, I understand why.’’

The love of Queen Elizabeth’s life, and her partner of more than 70 years, died in April. In January my best friend and dearest lost COVID, her husband. So, for the first time in her life, she is also experiencing that “missing.” Sometimes, as the years go on, you fail to recognize it; then, it suddenly dawns on you. As my late Uncle Charles so aptly said, “Death comes like a stranger.”

Since the deaths of my sister, June, holidays have been different. June, who was 13 years old, died from cancer. Joan suffered a heart attack four years before her death. Both were identical twins.

It’s made for a strangely discombobulated Christmastime, especially the last three years. Joan traveled to Los Angeles every year for Thanksgiving and Christmas for the last 10 years. This made it a very disorganized holiday season. As one of her friends said at her Homegoing, “Joan made doing everything, or doing nothing, fun!”

My fur babies were loved by her. Joan was a cat lover, but loved dogs as well, so Panda (may she rest in peace), Puppet, Maddie, and Puppet got lots of cuddles, kisses and pampering whenever she was there.

Joan loved finding new haunts and discoveries to capture and she was an avid photographer. Because of Joan’s adventurous spirit and willingness for exploration, I believe I learned a lot more about Los Angeles.

Now that spirit is no longer with me, and it’s left a gaping hole.

After a lengthy battle against a T-cell Lymphoma, June passed away in 2008. June and Gabi, Gabi’s daughter, lived together in Los Angeles for many years. When June died, she was still living with me as well as my new husband.

A number of Christmas festivities also included June. One of my favorite traditions was to host an annual Tree Trimming party where people were asked to bring an ornament that represented a particular theme. Although June didn’t love cooking, her ability to make delicious deviled eggs was unmatched by any other person I knew. Her special recipe would be made and she would help in the kitchen. I enjoyed the many ornaments and meeting new and old friends. Although she had been very sick before her passing, she managed to make those delicious deviled egg and help with some dishes. After she left her home, she returned to her room and welcomed anyone to stop by. Over the noise and people coming and going, I can still hear her laughter and conversations with friends she had made over the years. June later said that the experience was wonderful and that she was glad she felt well enough.

Today I am grateful for that Christmas memory. It was the last time I shared it with her. While I am missing those deviled egg sandwiches, what I most miss is her.

Joan and June were integral to the Christmas traditions that made it special. Even though I know the reasons for Christmas, many of the celebrations that I celebrate now seem hollow. It is not clear if this will change.

It is possible that the Queen feels a little of this, having shared seven decades of Christmases together with Prince Philip. It’s comforting to know that one can be partners in faith as well as partners in grief with the Queen of England. However, it’s also comforting that the Queen of England is leading by example for her grandchildren and great-grandchildren, as well her family. Living life to the fullest is what you choose. Your duty is fulfilled. Even in your despair, you continue to fulfill your duty.

Queen Elizabeth II, a strong example of strength and fortitude, is an excellent representation of the Christmas spirit.