Please Clap: The View Pitches Jokes for Biden, They All CRASH and BURN

With the White House Correspondents Dinner only a day away, the cast of The ViewOn Friday, President Biden was offered jokes that would target people who have the right to be roast. But things didn’t go as they expected as each of the three “jokes” fell flat with an audience that groaned and had to be cued to clap by their guest co-host Jane Lynch.

The segment began with Biden asking if he should deliver jokes when the country was divided and the rest of the world was in chaos. And after praising former President Obama as “hilarious,” co-host Sunny Hostin looked to comedian and co-host Joy Behar to pitch the jokes written by their “comedy writer” Frank Santa Padre. “Joe, take these. Write it down,” declared co-host Sara Haines.

Then, Behar produced this firebrand: “Madison Cawthorn wanted to be here, but there was a sale at Victoria’s Secret.” As the crowd sat silently, you could almost hear a pin drop. As the awkwardness of this situation creeped in, there were only a few chuckles.

Behar realized she had just been bombed and tried to explain it. “what’s wrong with” the jokeAna Navarro was the co-host and interjected her take on a Cawthorn joke. “Maybe Madison Cawthorn wanted to be here, but he got stopped at the airport trying to bring in a gun for the third time,”To an awkward silence form the audience, she spoke with a serious tone and nervous groans.

Behar tried to make her joke funny, as she does with every good joke.

BEHAR: And the reason this is funny—

[Crosstalk]

BEHAR: It’s hilarious! – but you have to know that he was caught wearing some kind of lady’s thing. This is what you need to know.

“Give us the next one. Give us the next one,” Haines pleaded to move on:

The next two came in rapid succession as each of them fell flat with a collective “ew” from the audience at the second “joke”:

BEHAR: Okay. Let’s see if this works. Marjorie Taylor Greene had hoped to attend tonight’s event, but her tinfoil head kept activating the metal detectors.

[Laughter from the cast, sparse recognition from the audience]

BEHAR: I got another one you’re definitely going to like now. America may be facing dark times. But not nearly as dire as Tucker Carlson’s testicles.

[No laughter]

LYNCH: That’s good.

[Groans and “ew” from the audience]

Haines chimed in with an “[a]h, there we go” as if collective disgust was the goal. And they had a Jeb Bush “please clap” moment when Lynch looked at the audience and started clapping to cue them to make some noise.

“Okay. So, I would say that Joe Biden should call Frank Santa Padre and he’ll write some jokes for him,” Behar said to be nice to their writer. “I think those are appropriate subjects. Those are good,”Lynch agreed. Lynch agreed. “target[s] are these people that are ridiculous.”

In an attempt to salvage their joke pitches, Hostin suggested Biden lean on “self-deprecating humor as well.” Behar agreed and said he should lean into the Sleepy Joe moniker. “He should just nod off. Like, say, ‘they call me sleepy Joe, I think that’s radicicolous,’” she quipped as she pretended to nod off too.

“Something like that because it’s always funny when you can make fun of yourself,” Hostin again explained the joke.

And before going to a commercial, Navarro seriously argued that “he can spend the entire set making fun of Florida. I mean, Florida’s become so crazy.” “There’s Disney stuff he can do with DeSantis. There’s’ a lot of stuff,” Behar agreed.

There’s a vaudeville hook when you need one?

These unfunny jokes are possible due to lucrative sponsorships by Ensure and Disney. The link will take you to their contact information.

You can find the transcript below. To read it, please click on “expand”.

ABC’s The View
April 29, 2022
Eastern, 11:06:56

(…)

SUNNY HOSTIN: Joy, you’re a comedian. It’s hard to handle such a situation.

JOY BEHAR: It so happens – Thank you for asking. We are fortunate to have a comedian on our staff.

HOSTIN: Okay.

BEHAR: And – Frank Santa Padre, and he has written what I think are three jokes that Joe Biden can use.

HOSTIN: Okay.

BEHAR: Okay. Here’s one.

SARA HAINES : Joe, please take these. It is important to write it down.

BEHAR: Madison Cawthorn was keen to come, but Victoria’s Secret had a sale.

[Mostly silences with groans and sparse laughter from the audience]

No? Okay. Let me tell you about the problem with

ANA NAVARRO – Madison Cawthorn may have wanted to come, but he was stopped by the airport while trying to get a third gun.

[No response from the audience]

BEHAR: No, that’s not as funny as this one.

[Laughter at the awkwardness]

BEHAR: And the reason this is funny—

[Crosstalk]

BEHAR: The reason this is funny – but you have to know that he was caught wearing some kind of lady’s thing. This is what you need to know.

HAINES – Give us another one. We need the next.

NAVARRO: Let’s move on to number two.

BEHAR: Okay. Let’s see if this works. Marjorie Taylor Greene had hoped to attend tonight’s event, but her tinfoil head kept activating the metal detectors.

[Laughter from the cast, sparse recognition from the audience]

BEHAR: I got another one you’re definitely going to like now. America may be facing dark times. But not nearly as dire as Tucker Carlson’s testicles.

[No laughter]

JANE LYNCH : It’s great.

[Groans and “ew” from the audience]

HAINES – Aha!

[Lynch ques that audience to clap and they follow]

BEHAR: Okay. Let me just say, Joe Biden needs to call Frank Santa Padre. He’ll come up with some funny jokes.

LYNCH (I think these are appropriate subjects). They are very good.

BEHAR: What? You ask why? These people are the most ridiculous.

[Crosstalk]

HOSTIN – And self-deprecating humor, too right?

BEHAR: Well, yeah.

HOSTIN: Because he’s been the target of so much I think and—

BEHAR: The man should simply nod off. Like say, “they call me sleepy Joe, I think that’s radicicolous — [pretends to nod off].

HOSTIN: Something like that because it’s always funny when you can make fun of yourself.

NAVARRO, I believe he could spend all of the set laughing at Florida. I mean, Florida’s become so crazy.

BEHAR: Disney. There’s Disney stuff he can do with DeSantis. There’s’ a lot of stuff.

(…)