I watched the Colin Kaepernick Netflix special so you don’t have to. You’re welcome.
Executive Summary: It’s unadulterated propaganda. Kaepernick’s utter disconnect from reality is alarming.
Kaepernick is the first to be seen, in his iconic costume. Each item of clothing you see is in black. All clothing, from head to toe and coat to the underwear is black. The series begins with an absurdity that is mind-numbing. Slavery is the definition of employment in the NFL. That’s his lead argument. He presents an image of two naked men in all black standing on a platform. The men appear to be NFL prospects. Kaepernick’s sharp voice is reflected in his acute stare at the camera.
“Before you are allowed on the field, teams poke, prod, and examine you, searching for any defect that might affect your performance. Respect is required at all costs. No dignity left intact.”
To “prove” his employment is slavery, half-naked men (all black) march off the stage and into an 1830s slave market. The slavers are bidding for them, and all the men are bound in chains. “Boy!” the slavers call them. As a black man is being auctioned, the scene shifts to the modern world — a white NFL coach and a black player. A black man, who was once a slave on the market is now being auctioned. “Sold!” cries a slaver. A slaver walks towards the camera and stops when an NFL coach is in view.
Because teams prescreen potential employees, NFL prospects can be considered slaves. Because NFL prospects take physicals, because they are timed in a 40-yard dash and are interviewed – that, in Kaepernick’s view, is the same as being shackled to a line of men and sold like a piece of farm equipment. Anything that requires physical fitness is considered slavery.
His NFL to Slave Market is made up of 10 black men. Kaepernick later asserts that 71% in the NFL are of African descent. According to The Washington Post, that’s false — it’s under 60% but facts are in short supply in “Colin in Black & White.” Sophistry and outright lies are in abundance. The opening scene ends with the 1830s slaver walking out of the past and into the present to shake hands with — the NFL coach. Get it? The best of both worlds are slaves and NFL coach.
In the next scene, Kaepernick appears as a teenage boy. He’s growing up in bucolic Turlock, California. Turlock is what I was looking up. It seems to be a quiet small town in California’s Central Valley. And based on what his dad did for a living they were “living large.” Kaepernick is 14 and a high school freshman. Kaepernick claims that he was already 14 years old when he became oppressed. It is evident by his actor. He had a constant “I’m disappointed” look on his face. Because Iverson was a cornrow farmer, he was his hero. Kaepernick talks a lot about cornrows. The first episode isn’t called “How the NFL Is slavery,” it’s titled “Cornrows.”
Kaepernick didn’t want to be “like Mike” or like Magic Johnson or like Larry Bird. But he was determined to become Iverson, the rebel. You ask? Cornrows. Kaepernick’s mom, who apparently raided June Cleaver’s wardrobe for costuming, wants to accommodate his wishes. How do we respond? So she speaks to two African-Americans sitting on a bench. She was likely the only mother of a black son in America who didn’t know what cornrows were, so she asks two black people sitting on a park bench. I mean, who wouldn’t — right? You can also bring visual aids. In front of all the blacks, she starts to act like Eliane from Seinfeld. They stare at her like she’s just vomited. Do they think she is rapping like June Cleaver? She then asks the black guy “Um, you like basketball right?” and shows a magazine cover depicting a black man (Iverson) with cornrows. With a look of incredulity, the black guy and woman recover but not before a disgusted look crosses the black woman’s face.
This black woman provides Mrs. Kaepernick with the telephone number of her stylist. Kaepernick’s parents haven’t spoken in public about their son since 2017. My theory is that Kaepernick’s parents have not spoken out publicly about their son since 2017. Kaepernick isn’t afraid to throw his family under the bus. It’s clear that Kaepernick wants you to believe that his mother was a tool and dumb as a brick. Kaepernick’s dad, a white-bread man with little to no knowledge, purchased his clothes from Ross Dress for Less. He’s the master of white man cliche.
The story continues with Kaepernick getting his cornrows in a Modesto-based Black-owned salon called Urban Exchange. Although the Urban Exchange is no more, this episode shows that it does have an attached barber/stylist store. It was never licensed for hair styling, but let’s give that likely fib a pass.
The stylist wants to know if the mom is white.
“You want me to bless shorty like the boy AI?”
Seriously — that’s what Kaepernick claims was the question posed to Mrs. Cleaver.
Mother answers
Colin must have his hair done after shorty has been blessed with AI. Mom drives Colin to the stylist’s home. It was quite a journey. In one of the shots, they are passing Red Liquor Market on the way to the stylist’s home. Like I said, long drive. Red Liquor can be found at the corner of 4ThSouthwest, in South Los Angeles. It is more than 300 miles away from Turlock. These are facts.
Before Mom leaves the stylist’s home, the stylist offers some food to Colin. It is accepted by him. Mom tells her that Colin needs some salt and pepper, “He puts it on everything!” “No,” replies Colin, “I don’t need it, this, is good.” In the span of 10 minutes of the first episode, Kaepernick wants the audience to know, mom is a dolt, dresses like June Cleaver, but unlike June Cleaver, she can’t cook.
Colin’s mom abandons him in the skilled hands of the stylist. He eats his snack and bobs his head to lyrics from Ludacris’ “Area Codes” music video playing on the TV.
Nate Dogg singing: “I’ve got hoes, I’ve hoes, in different area codes, in different area codes, I’ve got hoes”.
Kaepernick closes the first episode with his definition of the term “thug”; reminding the audience what a true “thug” is, and real thugs, are all white. There are images of white criminals. Al Capone first. Then skinheads. An image of Adolf Hitler saluting fellow Nazis follows. And finally, Kaepernick adds to his list of thugs and adds: “and some politicians.” The image of Donald Trump pops onto the screen. Trump is photo-illustrated with the word “thug” pointed at him with devil horns drawn on Trump’s head. Kaepernick adds a Trump voice-over repeating over and over the “very fine people” lie — tying something Trump didn’t do to Capitol rioters.
With more ridiculous sophistry, the second episode opens. This continues throughout the entire series. Rinse. Rinse. Anyone who walks away believing his message is dumber than the character playing Kaepernick’s mom. It is my hope that an intrepid reporter will be able to interview Kaepernick’s family, and interview all the white coaches he saw. I’d like to see a little perspective and a dash of reality — or at least a few “Yeah, that never happened” responses. However, it won’t matter.
“Colin in Black & White” is a collection of Kaepernick’s massive jumps of illogic, revisionist history, and false comparatives. It’s also a collection of self-worship and historical nonsense. Kaepernick views himself clearly as a hero and a prophet to believers. Many people believe in the cult that Colin is real. Cults don’t allow people to change their minds about logic and facts. Kaepernick has created a myth and that’s the world he and his flock inhabit. The coaching of black people is racism, employment is slavery and oppression. Cult of Colin.
“Colin in Black & White” isn’t a documentary it’s mythology.
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