Are you unhappy at your job? Are you looking for a better job?
If so, write this down: Seres Therapeutics is offering big bucks to those for whom dignity at work doesn’t mean squat.
The Massachusetts company’s website asks a question some might find hard to digest: “Want to be compensated for donating stool?”
That’s not a reference to chairs. Seres is a biotech company, and it’s looking for people who have something sizable to offer.
But the second ca-rear doesn’t have to be a strain: Amid going to the dump or dropping the kids off at the pool, just take some time to be a productive employee. A few minutes here and there, and you’re on your way to being at least the company’s Number Two worker.
This is what the website says:
Everybody has to run their own business. Your business should do some good. …
[Y]You may qualify to receive up to $1500 per month as compensation for donating your poop. Compensation may differ by location and may change. Participation could lead to further developments in the treatment of gastrointestinal disorders or other diseases that are directly related to a patient’s needs.
What is Seres’ eligibility criteria? You’ll be relieved to know…
The GoodNature™ Program is recruiting healthy individuals who have regular bowel movements and are 18 to 50 years old, are of a normal weight, don’t smoke, and have no history of gastrointestinal disease or alcohol or drug abuse to donate their poop.
Simple and straightforward.
However, you “must be available to donate three to four times a week at the collection site.”
Get more details:
People cannot participate while they’re pregnant, though we encourage them to keep us in mind for the future.
Those willing to put in the effort “can receive up to $75 for every poop donation.”
You can even see what each 75-buck bucketful of could get you.
- Tickets for your favorite band
- That shirt you’ve been eyeing
- Every morning, a cup of coffee
Oder you can put the money back in your business.
According to AZCentral, Arizonans who are entrepreneurial should take advantage of this opportunity.
Seres Therapeutics chose Tempe after a national search for a third GoodNature stool collection site, said Alex Murray, the company’s vice president of manufacturing and supply chain analytics.
Colleges are fecally particularly fertile, according to some reports.
“We looked for folks based on lifestyle and demographics, mainly in terms of age, general fitness level and culture in the area,” Murray said. “As we went out to visit a shorter list of different opportunities, being really close to Arizona State University, the level of activity and innovation in public health in the community just made a really good fit.”
They’re already doing big business:
Murray stated that company representatives visited the Aloha Fest at Tempe this weekend, and made connections with 150 potential donors. Prospective donors must pass multiple screenings. Among other things, company officials need to ensure the donors’ microbiome contains the bacteria needed for the Seres therapeutic.
The new location — which joins turd depositories in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and Irvine, California — is sticking to simplicity:
Tempe will only be used for GoodNature’s program. There will be no manufacturing operations, Murray said.
You don’t have to take in more than you can chew. You can continue the process.
So if you’ve been stewing to help humanity and you’re a fan of sitting on the job — and if you’re in close proximity to a drop-off point — contact Seres Therapeutics.
The money’s so close…you can almost taste it.
It’s a bonus to receive poop payments. Some donors have earned up to $10,000 in a calendar year because they stay with the program long enough, Murray said. …
People interested in becoming stool donors must first complete the eligibility questionnaire at goodnatureprogram.com.
Thank you to all who log in, for pushing for better health and for making the system available.
Murray stated that donors often come from people who have a genuine desire to help others.
Indeed.
Sign up with Seres, and put the “PU” in “Therapeutics.”
-ALEX
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