“No-one wants a repeat of the Regents Park dessert spoon massacre.”
London police officers triumphantly announced Tuesday that they had seized a weapons cache, only to be ruthlessly mocked by Americans.
The Regents Park Police, who are responsible for a ward of London’s Camden borough, tweeted a photo of the contraband, which included an assortment of old kitchen knives, a broken fencing sword, and a rusty spoon. They said they had swooped in a day earlier at the request of a local charity to ensure the implements didn’t “get into the wrong hands.”
Yesterday we conducted weapons sweeps,dealt with a person injured from a van reversing on them, reported a burglary and collected all these from @scope charity shop who diligently didn’t want them to get into the wrong hands & disposed of correctly & safely pic.twitter.com/GNfxZd6iGd
— Regents Park Police (@MPSRegentsPark) May 14, 2019
Independent journalist Tim Poole retweeted the post, noting: “Theres a fucking spoon and butter knife in this photo.”
“The UK has gone mad,” he said.
Police didnt want this cache of weapons to fall into the wrong hands…
Theres a fucking spoon and a butter knife in this photo…
The UK has gone mad https://t.co/S339ad5BLy
— Tim Pool (@Timcast) May 14, 2019
“They CHOSE to include the spoon,” Poole added in a followup tweet. “They could have just left it out. They really do think spoons are dangerous.”
In the replies, one concerned citizen said he had a silverware drawer to report.
@MPSRegentsPark I’d like to report a dangerous cache of weapons that I found at my friends house. Pls send help immediately pic.twitter.com/8Kcib8HLkv
— Unknown Caller (@EveryoneExits) May 14, 2019
“Cereal killer” trolled a user whose bio says he’s a former U.S. police officer.
Cereal killer pic.twitter.com/NUSZWJ58zc
— Donut Operator 🍩 (@DonutOperator) May 14, 2019
Dozens of commenters took shots at the United Kingdom’s reputation as a heavily regulated – not to say unfree and hyper-politically correct – island.
However, British Twitter users saw the humor in the Regents Police tweet, too. Scottish journalist Liam Kirkaldy helpfully shared a zoomed-in image of the spoon.
Regents Park police haven't played knifey-spoony before pic.twitter.com/nEQ0VSUTmC
— Liam Kirkaldy (@LiamKirkaldy_) May 15, 2019
Londoner Adrian Short sarcastically expressed appreciation that police were keeping locals safe from the next “spoon massacre.”
https://twitter.com/adrianshort/status/1128572384297070592
London really does have a knife problem. It’s just that officials have responded in ways conservatives in America would never tolerate, and liberals can only dream of.
Last April, amid a spate of deadly stabbings and a spike in the city’s murder rate, London Mayor Sadiq Khan announced a crackdown on knife crime, warning that anyone caught packing “will feel the full force of the law.”
No excuses: there is never a reason to carry a knife. Anyone who does will be caught, and they will feel the full force of the law. https://t.co/XILUvIFLOW
— Mayor of London (@MayorofLondon) April 8, 2018
Enter the Regents Park Police. According to their Twitter feed, the officers routinely conduct weapons sweeps, which have seen then take a variety of potentially harmful household items off the streets.
Last March, they boasted that they had safely disposed of some scissors, along with pliers, screwdrivers and a wood file.
These items were found during a #weaponSweep near #MackworthHouse #AugustasSt during #OpSceptre . Safely disposed and taken off the streets pic.twitter.com/53HdeqMKu1
— Regents Park Police (@MPSRegentsPark) March 16, 2018
A couple months later, in May, the Regents Park Police congratulated the Jubilee Police, another north London squad, on a similarly impressive bust, which included a heavily corroded wrench, a butter knife and a paint scraper.
“Great work,” wrote the Regents Park Police’s Twitter account, retweeting their colleague’s #CombatKnifeCrime announcement. “More deadly implements taken off the streets. Anything can be used as a weapon.”
Great work. 👍🏻. More deadly implements taken off the streets. Anything can be used as a weapon. https://t.co/wvkvWHtdIs
— Regents Park Police (@MPSRegentsPark) May 12, 2018
Neither account appeared to be joking, and they are not parodies.